Worst Jokes Ever
This stuff is messed up, you people.
What happened to the woman who dated a rapist?
She was date raped.
What did the cat say to the jar of cookies?
"Ground beef!"
What did Saturn say to Uranus? Hi.
A redhead, a dark-haired woman, and a blonde walk into a bar and agree to fly to the sun!
The blonde states, "I agree, let's leave at night!"
There was an orphan once, and someone knocks on his door and said, "Hello, son, come and hug me." But the orphan says, "Excuse me, who are you?" and the guy says, "You don't remember me? I'm your dad." And then the orphan says, "Fine then, if you're really my dad, come inside and let me ask you some questions." And the man says, "OK then, but I am really your dad." Then the orphan asked some questions to the man, and the man gets some of them right, so the orphan believes that the man is his dad. And then the orphan says, "You really are my dad?" and then he shows his dad his house, and the orphan has a roommate, and the dad and the orphan finally get to the bedroom, and then the dad knocks out the orphan, and then the dad starts to have something with the orphan/son, and the roommate hears weird noises in the orphan's/son's room, and he walks in and sees them having sex, and the roommate records it but then kicks the dad out of the house, and then the roommate shares the video to the orphan's school chat, and then the next day the dad gets arrested because he was actually a gay nonce, and everybody at the orphan's school calls him gay, but he really isn't, but since he was mad and disgusted, he pulled an AK47 out of his bag and kills everybody in the school and was never seen again.
Btw this is a joke so don't take it seriously.
Why did Stephen Hawking stop playing hide and seek with his wife?
She kept getting the metal detector out.
What do you call a booty that can do magic?
A butt trick!
If you give a dwarf 5-Hour Energy, will it become 2.5-hour Energy?
What do you call a peso?
A wetback greenback.
Q: What was the last thing the United Healthcare CEO heard before he got shot?
A: "It's me, Luigi!"
Fat kids are so fat, they have their own gravitational pull.
Why didn't Michael Jackson have a girlfriend? He's afraid of women.
The great meme reset is like a fart. If you force it, it's gonna be shit.
If you are a student at law school, a law professor can charge you up to $98,998.00 for one semester.
If the law professor is very late and is not punctual to teach you anything about law in his class, should a law student be able to charge the law professor a certain amount of money for not being able to teach his class because he is off task and not being punctual? Is your time precious too?
If the law professor is Polish, now you know the reason why you should never go to a law school that has a "dumb polack" for a law professor.
Sorry for your luck; it sucks to be you!
A black lady goes inside the drug store on Eight Mile Road in the city of Detroit, Michigan, and asks the pharmacist, "I would like to buy a box of tampons."
And then the black lady is asked by the pharmacist, "Do you want to buy the box of mini pads, or do you want to buy the box of maxi pads?"
And then the black lady asks the pharmacist, "What is the difference?"
And then the pharmacist asks the black lady, "What is your flow like?"
And then the black lady tells the pharmacist, "Linoleum."
Yo mama's so ugly that Sonic needed to go fast to get away from her face.
Your earlobes are so big, you can fit your mom inside of them 5000 times and still have room for more!
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they don't know where home is.
What do your BF and the Twin Towers have in common?
They both never get erect.