Worst Jokes Ever
What's the best response to a girl saying, 'What's up?'
'If I tell you, will you sit on it?'
Yo mama so fat, she don't need the internet because she is already worldwide.
Michael Jackson was on a boat with a bunch of children. The boat captain comes up to him and says, "Michael, we've come into some trouble and the boat is about to sink. We need to get off the boat right now." "But what about the children?" The captain said, "F*** them." Michael Jackson responded, "Is there enough time?"
I saw this advert in a window that said: “Television for sale, £1, volume stuck on full.” I thought, “I can’t turn that down.”
Hickory dickory dock. My wife avoids my cock. She's losing her and having an affair. So I had to slap Chris Rock.
What game do zombies like to play?
Corpse and Robbers.
Why do Emos love Christmas? So they can pretend they're ornaments and hang themselves on trees. Hope you liked it, happy holidays!
What is a cannibal's favorite place to eat?
Five Guys.
Welcome to Morgan's Morgue and Pizzeria where yesterday's loss is today's sauce!
Your teeth are so spread out my mom can drive her car through the gap in your teeth.
What do cannibals call newborn babies?
Fresh fruit.
what do you call a group of emos?... The Suicide Squad.
When does a doctor get mad?
When he runs out of patients!
Why do we tell actors to break a leg?
So they can get in the cast!
Student: "May I use the restroom, professor?"
Professor: "Oui oui."
Student: "No, professor, doo doo!"
What happens if a cookie turns emo?
It becomes a cookie cutter.
What's the difference between an iPhone and an orphan?
One has a home.
Bill gets home from work late again, and Susan is angry. She hollers at Bill, "I AM FURIOUS. When I go outside tomorrow, there better be something that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds!" Bill says, "Ok." The next morning there is a box outside! Susan opens it. It's a scale! Bill hasn't been seen since October 2, 2002.
When the school shooter knocks on the classroom door, and the autistic kid opens it.
Roses are red, violets are blue. Get over here so I can fuck you.