Worst Jokes Ever

What do you call a woodpecker with no beak? A headbanger.

At school, this gurl was like, "You're ugly!" And I'm like, "Gurl, your mirror cracks the moment you step in front of it."

Why were 9/11 victims so mad?

They ordered three pepperoni pizzas, not two planes!

Q: What does an orphan call a selfie of themself?

A: A family portrait.

I bought an orphan iPhone 8 Plus and he said he doesn't want it 'cause it didn't have a HOME button.

Crimes in 2018: assault, murder.

Crimes in 2020: coughing in public.

Why don’t Chinese people model? Because it would look like the same model every time.

Wanna hear a poop joke?

Nah, they always stink.

I have a really good construction joke.

But I'm still working on it.

Lately, I’ve been wearing sunglasses when I have sex.

So I don’t get pepper sprayed.

What do you call a black person in a swimming pool?

Coco Pops.

What kind of tea is hard to swallow?

Reali-tea.

Stop telling orphan jokes before they tell their parents.

Oh wait, they don't have any, please continue.

Why can't orphans play baseball?

Because they can't run home.

What do orphans and olden day actors have in common?

Both get food thrown at them some of the time.

Q: What happens when an Asian with an erection walks into a wall?

A: He breaks his nose.

My brother's addicted to buying ladders; he loves to get high.

Why can’t orphans win trophies?

Because they can’t take them home.

What's the difference between a pair of jeans and an African baby?

A pair of jeans only has 1 fly.

My mum told me to take out the trash, but I couldn’t find you.