Worst Jokes Ever

Man, this walk is really good. Oh wait, you can't.

How do you find a black person in the dark without a flashlight?

Tell them a joke to make them smile.

What do you call two homeless people throwing rocks at each other?

A pillow fight.

I have a joke about suicide, but I’ll just let it hang.

If I flip off an Asian person, he can't see it.

SOOOO my sister said her first bad word yesterday. "Shit." My mum was like, "What did you just say, child?"

Sister: "I said the cat shits inside like the dog shi- uh oh......"

Now I've avoided this stuff by making my own word: Sugarplum. Sugarplum = shit...

My sister made some pie, and it tasted horribly... so I said this.... "This pie is very sugarplum-y." She said, "What do you mean by that?" I said, "It tastes like sugarplums..."

Erectile dysfunction.

What's the difference between Jesus and a picture? You need only one nail to hang a picture, unfortunately.

Yo mama is so dumb that she went to the eye doctor just to buy an iPhone.

What does Cangaball do after eating its vegetables?

Go on eBay to see how much he can sell the wheelchair for.

What do my mom and a basketball have in common?

My mom's tits and ass are bouncy, just like a basketball.

My mom gave my friend a blow job for good luck on his job interview, then my mom gave my other friend a blow job for his interview, and they both got the job. Now who needs good luck? Just ask my mom. My mom is a good luck charm.

It's just been discovered that as well as writing a book, Adolf Hitler also wrote one of the first computer games, "Mein Kraft."

9/11 jokes are that deadly not even the towers could hold themselves up.

Man 1: Dude, Viagra is for pussies. Real men don’t need Viagra.

Man 2: I thought Viagra was for dicks?

Why are the UK and the USA bad at playing chess?

Because they lost 2 towers and their queen.

What’s the best part of having sex with a pregnant woman?

You can have sex and a blow job at the same time.

Knock knock.

Who's there?

Fuck.

Fuck who?

Fuck off!

What's the best thing about Switzerland? The flag is a big plus.

Happy New Year! 🍆🍑🍆🍑