Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

What a day yesterday was! I got a promotion, and my sister's killer was hit by a bus. Now I'm in a cast!

3 year old boy: 1... 2...uh....?

Older brother: Ooh I know! 1, 2, 3 get the fuck off my apple tree!

I thought happiness started with an “H.” Why does my happiness start with “U”?

Hey, wake up. I just murdered your family, but I live alone.

Then who are these people in your house? They are people in my house? Well, not anymore, dumb bitch. You're welcome, you could have died.

A man went into a library to get a book on how to commit suicide.

The librarian said, "No, you won't bring it back."

What happens when skeletons score points in a game?

They get a bone-us.

Q: I'm a famous athlete and I've got a lot of fans.

A: Is that why I never see you sweat?

What did one shoe say to the other shoe when they were fighting?

"I wanna sock in the eye so bad!"