Worst Jokes Ever
The 6th-grade science teacher, Mrs. Parks, asked her class, “Which human body part increases to ten times its size when stimulated?”
No one answered until little Mary stood up and said, “You should not be asking sixth-graders a question like that! I’m going to tell my parents, and they will go and tell the principal, who will then fire you!”
Mrs. Parks ignored her and asked the question again, “Which body part increases to 10 times its size when stimulated?”
Little Mary’s mouth fell open. Then she said to those around her, “Boy, is she going to get in big trouble!”
The teacher continued to ignore her and said to the class, “Anybody?”
Finally, Billy stood up, looked around nervously, and said, “The body part that increases 10 times its size when stimulated is the pupil of the eye.”
Mrs. Parks said, “Very good, Billy,” then turned to Mary and continued.
“As for you, young lady, I have three things to say: One, you have a dirty mind. Two, you didn’t read your homework. And three, one day you are going to be very, very disappointed.”
What do you call a bus full of transgender men? T-Mobile.
There is a lot of difference between a man and a woman saying, "I went through a whole box of tissues watching that movie."
What do you call a hot tub full of special ed students?
Vegetable Soup.
Moms have Mother's Day and dads have Father's Day. What do single guys have?
Palm Sunday.
Why do depressed people go to camp? To learn how to tie knots tighter.
Why was baptism invented?
How else was a priest supposed to clean his sex toys?
What do you call an orphan who grows up and becomes a priest?
Father Les.
Did you know Cobain had dandruff? Yep. They found his head and shoulders all over the back of his couch.
OTHERS (MOTIVATED): If I had FLYING as a SUPERPOWER, FALLING would be the BEGINNING STAGE.
ME (DEPRESSED): OK, GOOD IDEA! LETS FALL OFF THE CLIFF AND FLY TO HEAVEN!!
You gotta give it to JD Vance. He is consistent; he is Putin his dick where it don't belong!
Well, somebody has to cushion the blow.
I was driving and accidentally hit a crippled kid. They were still breathing, so I told them to walk it off.
Yo mama is so dumb, she thought Dunkin' Donuts was a basketball team.
An old man goes to a church and is making a confession:
Man: "Father, I am 75 years old. I have been married for 50 years. All these years I had been faithful to my wife, but yesterday I was intimate with an 18-year-old."
Father: "When was the last time you made a confession?"
Man: "I never have, I am Jewish."
Father: "Then why are telling me all this?"
Man: "I’m telling everybody!"
How are Xbox servers like hookers? First they take my money, and then they go down on me.
I took an hour-long shower. The German officers were looking at me kinda scared.
What do sped gymnasts wear?
A Reotard.
Who was purple and wanted to rule the world?
Alexander the Grape.
What’s the difference between white people and Black people?
One runs from the police, one runs for the police.
I just read in the news that tons of Americans are sending their old clothes to poor people in Africa.
Seems like a waste of time in my opinion. I've never seen an African with a 52 inch waist.