Who needs Singles Day when you're single for the rest of your life!
Worst Jokes Ever
What did the toaster say to the slice of bread? "I want you inside me."
Why can't the orphan run past third base?
'Cause the orphan doesn't have a home to run to.
What do you call a deaf dog? As you like, he doesn't hear you anyway.
I was digging outside and I found my child's old toy, so I ran to find him, but I could not find him, so I was searching for about 6 hours, but then I remembered why I was digging......
Women are like blackjack. I’m trying for 21, but I always hit on 9.
The only joke my dad ever made was me.
I don't need a girlfriend, 'cause I got my cousin, bro.
Why is basketball called basketball?
Because you play with a basket.
Teacher said, "You never do your homework," so I shot her 7 times with a M1 BushDid911 and replied, "It's all in my backpack, can you grade it please?"
Two air vents walked into a bar.
The third one ducted.
What makes laissez-faire and a gangbang the same?
Not my problem.
What do you call a deer that has no eyes?
No eye deer.
They're not jokes, they're notes now, get me?
I am in trouble.
Fineman, Einstein, and Schrodinger walked into a bar.
Fineman says, "It appears we're inside a joke."
Einstein says, "But only to an observer who saw us walk in simultaneously."
To which Schrodinger says, "If someone's looking through the window, I'm leaving!"
What's young, red, and has hot PTSD?
Prince Andrew's victims.
Why do orphans love going to church?
So they can call someone "father."
What's a cow's strongest part of their body?
Their "calves"!
What do you call a man with no body and no nose?
Nobody knows.
Statue of Liberty ain't even American, that b*tch is French!
