Student: It's hot in here.
Teacher: That's because I'm in here.
Worst Jokes Ever
Doesn't having depersonalization mean that you're like the animatronics off of FNAF/Five Nights at Freddy's?
(If you don't know what depersonalization is, look it up.)
Why are corners so hot?
They are always 90 degrees.
My girlfriend left me today for spending my own money. What a bitch! I spend a fair amount of money on her for her clothes and Air Force Ones, but as soon as I spend $100 on hookers, she leaves me.
Why did the guitar teacher get arrested?
For fingering the minor.
I walk into a bar. There was a line of people waiting to punch me. Yup. That was the punch line.
When your mom tells you there's a present in the laundry room,
The present: Laundry.
*gunshot*
What do you call a blind German? A not-see Nazi.
Your mom is so ugly she made a blind kid cry.
I saw an orphan on the road. I asked him if he's an orphan. The kid says, "Yeah, what gave it away?"
I say, "Your parents."
"My friend and her boyfriend were kissing until she puts her tongue down his throat, and what happens next is really weird."
The tongue gets stuck in his throat and starts to guh-guh-gughhh trying to get her tongue out of his throat, but it cumssssss out with spit all over his tongue, then they break up because he didn't want that to happen ever again...:/
Why did the flamingo cross the road?
Because it was the chicken's day off.
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Joem.
Joem who?
Joem Ama.
You're so ugly when a pig saw you, he said, "Yes, my brother is back."
Balls are balls, aka dicks.
Your mum is so fat that when she walked past the television, I missed a whole series of SpongeBob.
My grandfather said that ppl rely on technology too much these days, so I thought about what he said and decided to unplug his life support.
The Twin Towers ordered a pepperoni pizza, but they only got the plane.
When you want Pringles, but a fat person was eating them, there were only three left, sweety.
Mary: If you born pikin (child) inside shop, wetin you go call that pikin (child)?
Mike: The pikin (child) go bear Bishop.