Time jokes

I did a good walk and walk, walk home, and walk, walk home from school, and walk, walk home, and walk, walk home from school, and walk, walk home, and walk, walk home from school, and walk, walk home, and walk, walk home from school, and walk, walk home, and walk, walk home from school, and people live in the house with my dog. I had to a dog and.

We should enjoy the present while it's here. Do you know why they call it the present? Because it's a gift.

I hope next time you ask your teacher to go to the toilet, your teacher says no, but when someone else asks, the teacher says yes to them.

There was a Cheerio that had a job. He worked hard at it, and the boss came up and promoted him to the vice president of the Cheerios. So he needed a speech. He kept practicing and practicing and now he was thirsty. It was almost time for his speech, so he went to the drinking fountain, but there was a huge line. So he went to the lake, but he saw tons of garbage and what he thought was a cereal killer. So he found this bowl of punch, but he realized... there was no punchline.

Who are the fastest readers?

9/11 victims, they did 98 stories in 10 seconds.

What is a paedo's favourite time of year?

Halloween because they get free delivery.

I think about my life, and then I think about death. I prefer death. If you ask me, life is just a time when you die. Basically, death is life, meaningless 0-0.

I went shopping, and then to the hospital, and then to bed, and then I promised to only say "and" once in a sentence.

A guy is sitting at home when he hears a knock at the door. He opens the door and sees a snail on the porch. He picks up the snail and throws it as far as he can.

Three years later there’s a knock on the door. He opens it and sees the same snail. The snail says: “What the hell was that all about?”

Why did the orphan sit alone in the corner?

They wanted some family time.

Last time I talked to my girlfriend, she was yelling at me to put the hammer down.

How do you kill time?

Easy! Taking alarm clock and an assault rifle.

Your hairline goes back to the Middle Ages.

Best way to kiss someone is to lick inside their mouth with your tongue a lot of times, and they will really like it, especially me!! - lizard kiss+ french kiss= SloBbY Kiss.

Thanks for learning and getting advice.

Also, don't be such a horny one!

My uncle and I have somewhat of an awkward relationship. At times I find him a bit hard to swallow.

You're so dumb that every time you use the bathroom, you use your shoe to wipe your ass.

I threw a boomerang a few years ago. I now live in constant fear.

Emo kids are so good at kicking football. I hear they have good hang time.

My girlfriend got COVID.

This is the perfect time to propose to her. She might just say yes because of the lack of taste.

Why’s BBC called BBC?

The dude’s shlong gets bigger every time he says n-