Thought jokes

The Eagles when they actually thought they were gonna win the Super Bowl. 😹

I saw a girl with blond hair. She was sexy and beautiful. I thought she was the most hottest girl I ever saw, so I ran up to her feeling hot.

One time I broke a leg and I was using a wheelchair.

My parents thought I was a disappointment and put me up on eBay, the Ohioan Black Market, and the nearest adoption center.

Is it me, or was 9/11 too plane? I thought it would be more exciting.

Once at school, a teacher thought I was Russian. Why do you think that? I said. The teacher replied, because you're reading from Right to Left.

Yo momma so dumb that she thought Auradon was in "Varian And The Seven Kingdoms."

Yo mama so scary that the monsters have to look under the bed for her.

Yo mama so ugly that the monsters thought that she was their mother.

If I died and went to heaven, do you think I’d be friends with Prince?

The only thing that makes me want to stay alive more is the thought that Prince would hate me.

Your hairline is so deep people can see what you're thinking.

I thought you played football 'cause you're hairline is receiving.

Why do men get great ideas in bed?

'Cause they are plugged into a genius!

The short kid came earlier than I thought. Guess he came with such short notice.

People thought they were going to another country till they saw terrorists were flying the plane.

Yo mama so dumb, she thought TikTok was an alarm setup.

Your mama is so ugly, when she went to the circus they thought she was Pennywise, Mom.

Why can’t mental hospitals have Halloween?

Because the patients thought the pumpkins were them. I tried.

People generalize others too much.

"I want to kill my family."

-realizes-

Dad: Are you gay?

Kid: Yes.

10 days later.

Kid: I’m going to my girlfriend's house.

Dad: I thought you were gay?

Kid: What’s wrong with you? He’s the girly girl of our relationship, dumba**.

Dad: Don’t swear and okay, bud.

I thought you were just raising your eyebrow, but I checked the x-ray, and your skull shifted 128 degrees to the right.