Thought jokes

Yo mama's hairline got so many peaks and valleys, you thought you were looking at the Grand Canyon.

There is this celebrity everybody thought was so down to earth. That was until he hung himself.

Hi guys, I am so happy and proud of myself and I thought I should share with you! Today I saw myself on TV when I turned it off.

I thought I told you to lock up when I left this morning. This is why our shit gets stolen all the time!

I was happy for once, and my family was happy I was happy, but that all changed when they found out I was thinking about bridges and humans.

The humor of this generation of kids shouldn't be called 'brain rot'; it should be called 'brain rape.' I believe most people of this generation that aren't 5-year-olds could agree with me, but my mind and thoughts have been violated by the things that kids these days find funny and entertaining. #SKIBIDDI

That awkward moment when you thought the guy was a pretty good magician, and only then realize he simply suffers from leprosy.

I was watching the local chief police in America, he said, "We will never forget 911." I thought, "I should hope not, it's your phone number."

I told my friend an egg joke yesterday.

He thought it was eggcellent.

You've realized I exist? Huh, cool.

Roses are red, violets are blue. I thought someone else was ugly, but then I saw you.

There are so many things going through my head. Sadly, none of it is a 9mm.

If I don't find a reason to live soon, my ceiling fan isn't the only thing that's gonna be hanging from my ceiling.

Your hairline is pushed back; we can see what you are thinking of.

Momma's House-By-watersharky Productions and Dustin Lynch- I see your face on every street, every corner, couple trees. Even got her name on 'em. I feel your love, I hear your laugh, got them take me way on back. Hurt me memories, I don't want 'em. Up and down the boulevard. In and out of every bar. I'd burn this whole town down. Pick a spot, dig a hole, put them ashes in the ground. Baby, I'd burn this whole town down. If it wasn't for my momma's house, my momma's house. Damn girl, why'd you have to break it like that? Leaving pieces of my shattered heart scattered like glass. I'd burn this whole town down. If it wasn't for my momma's house, my momma's house. I would start it where we started, at the downtown party Where you kissed my lips and stole my beer. The city park in the dark where we looked up at the stars Watched them fireworks pop last year. It started under that Texaco sign where you said goodbye I'd get some gas and drop a match right there. I'd burn this whole town down. Pick a spot, dig a hole, put them ashes in the ground. Baby, I'd burn this whole town down. If it wasn't for my momma's house, my momma's house. Damn girl, why'd you have to break it like that? Leaving pieces of my shattered heart scattered like glass. I'd burn this whole town down. If it wasn't for my momma's house, my momma's house. Fire red flames, sunsets in the sky Going out, staying in, staying up long nights. Now I'm waking up alone, wishing I could move on Blocked your number in my phone, thought it help but it don't. I'd burn this whole town down. Pick a spot, dig a hole, put them ashes in the ground. Baby, I'd burn this whole town down. If it wasn't for my momma's house, my momma's house. Damn girl, why'd you have to break it like that? Leaving pieces of my shattered heart scattered like glass. I'd burn this whole town down. If it wasn't for my momma's house, my momma's house.

Please encourage me to do suicide! ;P

"Maga be like Antifa invaded Ukraine, but I thought Antifa was Russia, you dumb Maga chuds!"

Hi 👋 I have some good idea 💡. What was the best game I’ve [played]?

We saved a transvestite in a tight mini skirt from a tree.

I thought I showed a lot of balls.

Ur mom so stupid that she thought that Seventeen has four ghost members.