They jokes
Why do mountains get so big?
They have no natural predators.
Roses are red, Violets are blue, Two gay lovers find out they are brothers.
So... here's da scoop, alright... *licks KFC off lips* so, I was caught having sex wit three 6 year olds (girls btw, just in case you guys get mad) and da judge told me I was getting da death penalty, you know what I mean?
I had a last resort to save myself though, you feel me? So I told da judge, I said to him, I said: "Yo honah, 6 + 6 + 6 = 18, you smell me?"
Needless to say, I was announced a fre-e-e-e-e-e-e man after dat, you feel me?
But then, the Predator Poachers nigckas just barged into the courtroom and they said: 4 + 4 + 5 = 13!
Alas, I'm writing this joke from jail, and judging by the look my prisonmate Tyrone is giving me, I'll be writing jokes from hell from now on.
So Jesus has been nailed to the cross.
On the first day, he starts to moan, "Peter, Peter!"
Well, Peter hears Jesus moaning and feels it is important, so begins to go up the hill. On his way, he is met by some Roman soldiers and they proceed to beat his ass back down the hill.
On the second day, Peter hears Jesus moaning again, "Peter, Peter!"
Peter thinks to himself, this is important. He heads up the hill, fights past the first line, but gets a beatdown by the second group and back down the hill he goes.
On the third day, Peter is woken up by Jesus sounding very weak, but calling out, "Peter, Peter!"
Peter feels that whatever it is that Jesus needs him for must be very important. Peter heads up the hill, he is on a mission. He manages to fight his way thru three sets of Roman guards and make his way to the cross Jesus has been nailed to for three days. He looks up to Jesus and says, "Jesus, I have heard your calls, what is so important?"
Jesus- "Peter, I can see your house from here!"
What is the reason for why women never look to the right?
Because they don't have any rights.
THey do be tryna snitch tho
When they say beat that pussy, I don’t play so punch it.
We should stop taking the piss out of Asian people. I mean, they already have enough on their plates... like cats and dogs.
What is an orphan's least favorite store?
Family Dollar, they just can’t seem to find one.
Why do oranges wear sunscreen? So they don't peel.
My friend Josh made a joke about Liam's nonexistent hairline, even though Josh has massive ears and his face looks like a monkey's... if they were white.
Why do orphans love boomerangs?
Because they always return.
What did they find in Paul Walker's glovebox?
His head and shoulders.
The only reason gay people exist is because they couldn't get the opposite gender.
Why don’t coffins have Wi-Fi?
Because they don’t want people to be so ‘connected’ while they’re trying to rest in peace.
Name one person who would take an orphan?
Michael Jackson, so they can play all night.
Why can’t orphans date?
Because they have no one to call "daddy."
Why is it ok to hit an orphan? It’s not like they can tell their parents.
Why do orphans love boomerangs? Because they come back.
What do orphans do after they win a game?
Nothing, they have no one to play games with.
Why are cheetahs bad at running away? They always get spotted.
Why are orphans whores?
Because they want a sugar daddy. 🙃