That jokes

Yo mama so fat and old, she's the meteor that wiped out the dinosaurs!

You like bread toasted? That means you're roasted.

Bully: Ur momma so fat that the whales said we are family even though you are a little bigger than us.

Nerd: Yo momma so ugly that when she went in the bathtub, the water jumped out.

Silence...................punch!

Is your ass jealous of the amount of shit that just came out of your mouth?

The only woman to ever tell you that they loved you was your mom. (If she even loved you in the first place.)

I am gay, is that ok?

I be on top sucking dick all day. I make him bust every day.

Yo chin is so bumpy, someone said, "Is that Mt. Everest?"

Kid: Mom, do trees poop?

Mom: Yes. That is how we get #2 pencils.

My grandfather told me I’m too reliant on technology, so I unplugged his life support and called him a hypocrite. I doubt he ever said that to anyone ever again.

What do you get when you cross a fat christian nationalist that is heteroflexable, a christian nationalist politician who is also a born again christian, a conservative republican that has a small penis, and a tv evangelist on steroids?

Why were Twin Towers mad that their food wasn’t good enough?

Because they got plain.

Damn bro, that calculator is looking hot today. It got abs!

My friend told me to beat that pussy up... so why is the local animal control at my door?

Yo mama is so ugly that not even goldfish smile back at her.

Have you ever been accused of a crime you didn't commit? Well, I have! I was wrongfully accused of larceny yesterday. I'm not smart enough for that, I just stole some stuff.

Teacher: What do you want when you grow up?

That depressed kid in class: Dead.

So I suggested to my wife that she'd look sexier with her hair back...

Which is apparently an insensitive thing to say to a cancer patient.

What do you call a traffic light that tells you, "Don't look, I am changing!"

What do you call a Democrat that is a progressive?

A Democrat that lost in a presidential election.

Hey, I just wanna be in bed. I just wanna stay ahead. I just feel like I am dead, And I like that color red. Hey, I am not the big fat loser, And you're just a big accuser, You user and excuser.

Say this to you sister, toxic BF, anyone :)