That jokes

Butcher

  • First date be like:

    Me: "I work with animals every day."

    Her: "Oh, how sweet! What is it exactly that you do with them?"

    Me: "I'm a butcher."

    Kid

  • One late night, my wife caught me standing in front of the freezer.

    She asked me, "What are you doing?"

    I replied, "I'm making a pink yeti."

    She asked, "What does that mean?"

    I said, "I left our kid in the freezer for a couple hours."

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  • Basement

  • I had to go to my friend's house.

    I went in her basement and I saw taped mouths that are KIDS in the basement... Is my friend OK???

    Orphan

  • My favorite dark joke is orphan jokes. For no apparent reason.

    (If you see this joke with a blue "S" that's also me. I just have an acc now.)

    Orphan

  • What happens when an orphan is told that someone had found their parents?

    They cry...

    They scream... with joy.

    "Oh wait, no, that wasn't your parents."

    Orphan grabs a knife out of the kitchen, lets just say, the orphan didn't live to tell the tail...

    Knock

  • Knock knock.

    Who's there?

    Orange.

    Orange who?

    Orange ya glad this isn't another stupid orphan joke that has been posted 10 times before!

    Baby

  • What's worse than a dead baby?

    A pile of dead babies.

    What's worse than that?

    One's alive at the bottom.

    What's even worse than THAT?

    It eats it's way out.

    Wait it gets worse...

    It goes back for seconds.

    Just one more I swear...

    It fucks one of it's siblings at the bottom.

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  • Idk

  • My friend asks me what does "idk" mean. I said, "I dion't know." My friend says, "You mean I don't know." I said, "That's what I said!"

    Ex

  • When you're so rich that you can buy anything, you end up getting a cow in your living room. Yeah, anyways, my ex is still in my living room.

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  • Name

  • If your name is Jack, I think you are a stupid person that leaves their friends and blocks them on everything.