That Jokes

I like touching things that have been in space. I was super excited when I got to meet an astronaut.

The man told the women, “Roses are red, violets are blue, you suck cock and you enjoy it too.”

Then she said that's true.

I heard that Uranus is pronounced "yuuranus," but it reminded me of urine! 😆

When you're watching a 9/11 documentary, that one kid in your class finds the 97th Jenga block and knocks it down.

Hiii everyone, I heard from many people that they want to join the "stop orphan jokes" group. Who wants to?

A screenshot of a text message exchange. One message says, "Come on, I wasn't THAT drunk was I?" The other says, "Dude, in WalMart when the intercom thing came on you dropped to your knees and screamed, 'THE LORD HAS SPOKEN!'" The first person then replies, "...Awesome"

Ur momma's so fat that when she became a spy her codename was OObese.

When you hide in the girl's bathroom so the school shooter won't go in there: 😃

When you notice that the school shooter is female: 😟

Like, if you hate wearing a mask.

Every time I'm out in public, and I see someone without their mask, I always feel like there is something extra special about them. Then I realize that I can see all their face!

True story by the way.

So a mom went to her kid and said, "If you pray to God, He will give you your sight back." So he did exactly that.

The next morning, the mom heard a scream, so she went to the kid's room and asked, "What's wrong?" The kid replied, "It didn't work!" The mom said, "April Fools!"

My step-dad works at a lumberjack company and he took me to work. I went climbing trees later that day and now I'm in the hospital.

Why did my mouth say no to butt? Because that would be too much sex.

What do you call a can opener that doesn't work? A can't opener.

Guys, I know this is kinda weird, but everyone who wants to... Put your name and your age in the comment section. Not address though because that would not be good for creepers... Lol I am Lucy and I am 15 years old. What about you guys? :D

I AM SFLUGO FOUNDER OF THE PRO ORPHAN JOKE CLUB. Just want to say that people spamming does nothing and we will keep making our jokes!! #SaveOrphanJokes and please say in the comments if you want to join the club.

I am looking for a Robert "Jamie" Weber. He is a friend of mine from 3rd grade that welcomed me as the new kid. I am currently in 6th grade going into 7th grade (summer brake).

When I got to you and I was android and we were all in Minecraft for the last two years and we had the same problem UI with you anymore but you can see it on Instagram that it is not a real time thing or a android.