That jokes

My friend has glasses, and we were talking about owls, and I told my friend to give an owl glasses. I told my friend that it'd be a spectacled owl!

What do you call a duck that can fix anything? Duck tape.

Yo what quacking lacking? Looking for a ducking good time? I've got some one lines and knee slappers that ought to fix the bill. What happens flied upside down? It quacks up.

One morning I saw three kids were bullying one other kid because they didn't have a dad...

Later that day the three same kids were walking toward an orphanage. :)

Did you know that..

Studies show 9 in 10 Americans do not have basic math skills.

Oh, thank god I'm in that 1%.

I got a sister.

That was a big mistake.

I saw an emo kid that got a haircut today. But instead of saying “Like ya cut, g” and slapping the neck, I slapped the wrist and said “Like ya cut’s g”.

I caught my wife this morning gazing at our marriage license of long ago that hangs upon our wall with tears in her eye!

Almost got teary eyed myself until she told me she was only looking for the expiration date!

I don’t see why people say that emo kids don’t like to hangout. I seen them hanging all day.

It is a known fact that you cannot say “harassment” without “her ass.”

I guess you could say, “harassment something.”

Did you know that chips taste like the baked potato in things called bags of chips?

Your mamma is so fat that she has a gravitational pull.

Do you know Wildee?

What's that?

Will deez nuts fit into your mouth?

Helen Keller is so Helen Keller-y that nobody will be as good as Helen Keller.

Anthony Blinken's life sucks, and getting COVID-19 positive is the only positive thing that ever happened in his entire life!

Your mom is so overweight that she broke the stairway to heaven.

"If you yeet one thing that has been yoted, the yeet gods will help you" - Chris Tyson, MrBeast's friend, and your mom >:)

I found a key that works for every door at my school.

Yo mama is so fat that when she walked past the TV, I missed three episodes.

Whoever said men will f**k anything that moves is *dead* wrong.