That jokes

I met a girl that was 6'5" and she fell on 9/11 and broke her arm. She really said "oh snap" like a twin tower.

Did you hear about the nun that got kicked out of the convent?

She got caught squatting on the cucumbers in the garden.

If a midget says your hair smells nice, is that sexual harassment?

The first thing a man looks at in a woman, is her heart.

The fact that her breasts block the view is not her fault.

That was a horrible pun. You should be sent to the PUN-itentiary!

Some people think jokes about child abuse are funny.

I'm not sure if I think that, but they do seem to hit different.

Prostitution. The only job that pays more if you suck.

The fact that I am high won't stop me from advising you.

Don't plug your phone while charging it; it is very dangerous.

What is the difference between an orphan and a deaf kid?

They can't hear or speak to their parents that never came back.

One man's trash is another man's treasure. That sucks when you are adopted.

Your hairline is so long that when you finally found the length of it, you told someone and they said, "Don't give me your phone number."

Chiropractor: Final neck adjustment in 3, 2, 1. How did that feel?

Me: *silence*

A depressed man has been thinking of killing himself, and his friend says, "Find God, he'll help you!"

Then the man said, "There’s only one way to get to God, and that is through Jesus. Have you, my friend, found him?"

You're so ugly that blind people cry when you walk past them.

Russia is so corrupt that Putin was voted most sexiest man.

The person that created the knock knock joke won the Nobel reward.

Why does that kid have to stay in that orphanage?

He should just go to his mom and dad!

Hey Jorden Calerendiá, your last name sounds like a sea food shop that I get my fish from.

Your roasting is trash just like you. Boy, stop roasting on Addison and Gwen and others; you're probably 5 years old trying to dislike that. That roasting is like from 1920, get a life.

Studies have shown that in London, a person is stabbed 24 times a second. Poor bastard!

I always wanted to go to the store as a kid because I always wanted to look for my dad that went to go get the milk, but I could never find him.