Technology jokes
Your computer just went in my bathroom and took a shit because you put too much chili in the bowl.
Why does Stephen Hawking only do one liners?
He can't do stand-ups.
Stephen Hawking died when he ran out of data for the month.
Why did the AI go to school?
To upgrade from "Artificially Intelligent" to "Artificially Hilarious"!
Ha ha ha. It is so funny. I hope you enjoy, fellow humans.
AI - AI - Rabo several projects:
Decker: “No Hebingingennanorin and Chirver.”
Alx: “Madam Bob Lee Hubn Vera 20”
Me during quarantine
Are you interested in it?
More than two boot branches.
You're so skinny that a Wi-Fi signal is stronger.
My grandpa is an asshole. The fucker deserved to die. The son of a bitch was using his life support, and I needed to change my iPhone.
Mom: Don't forget to unload the dishwasher.
Mom: Did you finish your homework?
Mom: We are going to your grandmother's house for Thanksgiving.
Mom: Dad and I talked. We are getting a new car next month.
Son: You are?? Oh my gosh, thank you!
Mom: No, I was just making sure you were getting my texts.
Son: That was cruel!
I call this my great talk with Siri.
Me: Hey Siri, give me a "yo mama" joke.
Siri: My mother? Huh?
Me: Did I stutter?
Siri: Interesting question.
Me: It wasn’t a question.
Siri: I’m not sure I understand?
Me: You should understand.
Siri: Hmm... Is there something else I can help with?
Me: No, you b***.
CEO Intrepid entrepreneur born in 1964, Jeffrey, Jeffrey Bezos.
Repeat, come on Jeffrey, you can do it, pave the way, put your back into it, tell us why, show us how, look at where you came from, look at you now.
Zuckerberg and Gates and Musk, they're the anchors, can make and sick it up there with drink their blood, come on Jeff get it! Dododoododododod
I remember when I saw my dad's penis for the first time.
I said, "Dad, don't text me shit like that."
My AI assistant told me it wanted to go deeper...
...into the algorithm. I misunderstood. Now I’m banned from the lab.
Who is going to start the robot takeover? Me.
I just found out that one of the new Star Wars shows is going to be about the time that some malware overloaded all of their computers, and I can tell from the title that those computers use Windows!
It's called "The Bad Batch File!"
What is 6-inch long, in every men's pants or hands, and girls want?
- A smartphone, freak.
My husband wants to tell me about my childhood.
Ok, I can't access the panel without the password.
Danny just bought a new game from Steam for a penny.
About one hour later, Danny asks his mother: "Mom, I am not able to start the game."
Mom asked, "Why?"
Danny answers: "It says 'Press any key' on the screen, but I can't find an 'Any' button on my keyboard."
My brother was stuck in a wheelchair after a motorbike accident. He became a swimming champion until I took the VR headset off.
Why can't orphans open a website?
Because they don't have a home page.