Technology jokes
You do not spell "computer" like this; you spell it like this: "cumputer."
My sister just sits on the toilet with her iPad, then I go to do something at the sink and she says, "Bella, give me toilet paper!" Then I am annoyed, like super annoyed.
The reason Stephen Hawkings died is probably because he fell off his wheelchair, and he must've pressed shut down by accident.
The reason he died is that they accidentally flipped the wrong light switch.
I saw Stephen Hawking using an ATM. It is nice to see he had found someone before he shut down.
Memes
Your not actually cute so shhhhh
What is a great š for?
Fun.
Tech administrator of a school: Hm, a message from Google security?
Tech administrator of a school: OH SHIT!
Assistant: WHAT, WHAT, TELL ME?
Tech administrator of a school: WE'VE BEEN COMPROMISED, WE FORGOT TO SECURE THE SITE!
Assistant: OK, OK, THE KEY IS NOT TO PANIC... let's call the school board.
A FEW MOMENTS LATER
Head of school board: HAHAHAHAHAHA! That's a good one, almost as good as the one with Jack, Jill, and the ripped condom! HAHAHAHAHAHA
Tech administrator of a school: HAHAHA yeah I know right *whispers* you are playing it cool, right?
Head of school board: *whispers* yeah we're fucked...
TWO HOURS LATER
Important fat people in one room: OH FUCK OH NO, HELP PLEASE!!!!! WAIT, HOW ARE WE SUPPOSED TO TELL THE PARENTS ABOUT THEIR STOLEN INFORMATION!!!
AND SO THAT WAS THE BIRTH OF RIOTING TEACHER
When a kindergarten teacher asks a kid to sing the alphabet, he said "ab3defg." The teacher said, "Do you like 3D?" He said, "Yeah." The teacher yelled, "Okay, do you have a 3DS?" He said yes. The teacher goes into his bag and says, "Say ABCs or your 3DS will be destroyed." He says, "ab3defghijlmnopqrs." "Oh, he learned well." The teacher threw the 3DS out the window. The kid gets it, and it still works. Then he googles ABCs. It goes to YouTube and says, "abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz." The teacher is proud of the 3DS. The class went home telling parents.
What happens when you say, "Hey Siri?"
Stephen Hawking answers.
Are you a printer? Because you turn my soft copy into a hard copy. Dark..Humor :)
Why do Japanese people hate iPhones? Because they're scared that American airdrops will fall on them.
The only reason he died was because Virgin Media wifi crashed.
His wife shut off the internet.
Fucking Windows updates!
The reason why Stephen Hawking died is because he tried to overclock his wheelchair.
What do you call my IP? 74.125.224.72 hahahahahahahahaha
Stephen Hawking died because his wheelchair couldnāt run Windows 10.
I heard Microsoft got charged, why?
They couldnāt reboot Stephen Hawking.
You know what really grinds my gears? Robots and liars...for example that Stephen Hawking fella. He sure looks and sounds like a robot!! And a major liar too! If he wanted to show me how smart he really was he would have figured out how to get up out of that four wheeler and tell me how smart he is!!!!!
Damn, this computer stopped working. It's got autism.