Technology jokes

I really like those "driverless cars." I saw loads of them last week in the car park.

Friend: My mum took my phone from me, and I really want it back.

Me: Yeah, well, Hades took my parents from me, and the funny thing is, I don't want them back.

When is the last time you picked up the phone?

Yo mama is so ugly that when she turned on the TV, it changed channels by itself.

Your computer just went in my bathroom and took a shit because you put too much chili in the bowl.

Why can't orphans close their video games?

Because they can't find the home button.

What does a baby computer call its father? Data.

Why was the Computer late to work?

'Coz it had a hard drive... LMAO

Can't wait for Stephen Hawking's next update.

Stephen could not click the "I'm not a robot" button, so I guess he is fucked.

Stephen Hawking died when he ran out of data for the month.

What do you call a person that guards a Samsung store?

A Guardian Of The Galaxy :)

What were Stephen Hawking's last words?

*Windows turning off*

How did Stephen Hawking die?

Someone pulled his ethernet cable (he died of a blue screen)!

How did Steven Hawking die?

He blew a fuse doing an update.

Stephen Hawking died because he did a wheelie and unplugged his charger.

Stephen's not dead; his WiFi is slow.

What is Stephen Hawking's favorite crisps?

Microchips 😂

I love my new phone.

What's Stephen Hawking's favorite snake?

Microchips.