Speed jokes
Chuck: That's my sister, mister, and I'm gonna save her!
Red: snooore, snoooore
Silver: *straining to get outta buff eagle's grip*
Chuck: *goes super sonic speed and breaks outfit*
Chuck VS RED
Both LOSE!
You make Sanic look like a PRINCESS when he's next to you.
Yo mama is so dumb, she put speed bumps on the race track.
Why did the wall fall over?
A drunk driver hit it going 90mph and died.
One day when I was driving around our children's school with my wife, she saw a speed bump. She told me to slow on it, and when I did, we heard a loud, long scream.
What is the fastest cake in the world?
Scone.
9/11 pilots are the best readers.
They went through 30 stories in less than an hour.
What is the difference between Paul Walker and the Queen?
Paul Walker passed 100 before he died.
If Leo were any slower, she’d be going BACKWARD.
What do you call a fast boat?
Usain Boat.
It’s like Sonic always says, “If you’re ever bored, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do, tell their parents?”
Yo mama's so fat, her belly button gets home 15 minutes before she does.
The cheetah and lion are racing. The cheetah wins.
The lion says, "Man, you a cheetah."
The cheetah says, "Nah, you lion!"
Why did you and Sarah break up?
'Cause she cheetahed on me.
Who are the fastest readers in the world?
9/11 victims, they went through 87 stories in 7 seconds.
You know you're fucked when the speed bump screams.
What world record did the people in 9/11 get?
The world record for going down 80 floors in a matter of seconds.
What do queer guys call hemorrhoids? Speed bumps!
Why was the rapper always in a rush?
Because he was on the FAST TRACK to RAP STARDOM!
Why do cheetahs run? Because they are spotty.