Sound jokes
I called my dog J. They said, "Joné."
Sy'kyira (😌): I can't wait for the therapist to come.
Daina (😊): Same, 30 minutes have passed... I also wonder what that loud sound is.
Sy'kyira (😅): SAME!!!! What, does it sound like a woman suffering???
Daina (😌): I know, right?
What pronouns does Michael Jackson use? Hee/hee.
I saw a sign that said “Watch for children” and I thought, “That sounds like a fair trade.”
Twin monks who ring the church bells died.
Now they are dead ringers. :)
What did the DJ say to the VEGETABLE?
"Lettuce turnip the beet!"
What do you call a door that bells? A doorbell.
What did the cat say when he got mad?
I'm hissed!
Why can you never hear bunnies having sex? Because they have cotton balls.
Silence is golden. Unless you have kids, then silence is suspicious.
When my dog starts to bark, he starts to get ruff.
"Meow, meow, I'm a cow," I said.
"Meow, meow, I'm a cow."
Why did the clock out the library?
It tocked too much!
One day a couple was walking when the man stepped on something hard and squishy, then they heard a sound from the bushes. Instead of looking down, they both ran.
Two years later, they turned on the TV to find Ted Bundy on trial. They asked him if he has ever been caught. He said, "No, but a couple was walking as soon as I killed a girl. I jumped into a bush. They didn't know I was there, but the man stepped on the dead body but didn't look down, then he and his girlfriend ran."
People with Down syndrome have a specific skill only they have; they can give a blow job and talk to you while sounding exactly the same.
Why do women love wind chimes?
They vibrate.
"Have a nice day" and "enjoy the next 24 hours" mean the same thing, but one sounds like a threat.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
The butt.
The butt who?
The butt goes mooooo!
What's the worst part about hearing a special needs kid getting hit by a car?
Having to listen to the wheelchair scraping for a mile and a half.
Say "traffic," and replace "r" with "h." It sounds like... that thicc.