Sound jokes
Alpha Kenny body?
What did Ahsan do?
Meow meow.
I like your cut, G.
*Slaps really hard*
BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-
What’s the difference between a fly and Lady Diana?
The sound when they hit the windshield.
How do you know you broke into a gay man’s house?
The weird moaning sounds when you try to slide in the back door.
Followed by slipping in Kentucky (KY) Jelly.
Followed by landing in deep shit.
Followed by being totally covered in sea men.
Why do women love wind chimes?
They vibrate.
Why does the Please Touch Museum sound like "police touch museum?"
Because they gotta watch out for the pedos.
How do you make a cat say woof? You cover it in petrol and light a match.
"Why couldn’t the DJ keep any of the fish he caught?
He kept dropping the bass."
What did the rapper say to the computer?
“Yo, stop laggin’ my FLOW!”
*School Shooter Walks In*
That one kid who plays "Pumped Up Kicks" at max volume.
How does a train sneeze?
It goes, "A-choo choo!"
What do you call a door that bells? A doorbell.
Would you like some wine with those French cries?
How to harass? Say it out loud but slowly. Split that word into, and it sounds like "her ass."
For some reason, quarks sound really strange to me.
"I hear you asking, 'What's your favorite instrument?' The Trombone."
What do you call mouse sneakers? Squeakers!
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Who.
Who who?
You sound like an owl.
A man is depressed and he sighs. A bully says, "Stop sighing, you sound like some guys having a threesome!"