Solution jokes
I always sucked at mazes. I found myself lost over and over again, but if life is a labyrinth, I'd always find the escape. The final dead end, my personal favorite...
I've realized that suicide would solve all my problems... if I could just get the right people to try it.
How do kill a redneck?
Wait until he is fucking his sister and take the brakes off his house.
What's the best way to remove gum from hair?
Cancer.
I was going to make a pun about math, but my answers never add up.
no thank u for sleeping
Your hairline is like a math expression, there is no solution.
The greatest doctor, smartest man, young geek, and inspiring preacher are on a plane. The pilot dies of a heart attack and is confirmed by the doctor. But, there are only 3 parachutes on the plane. The doctor takes one and says,
"People need me for my excellent medicine!" and jumps out. The smart man grabs one and shouts,
"People are in need of my great knowledge!" and jumps out. There is only one more parachute on the plane. The preacher says to the geek,
"You are too young. Take the final parachute and go." The geek instead says,
"No, there are two parachutes left, the 'smart' one took my backpack."
Windows could not connect to the Internet, would you like to search online for a solution to this problem?
How do you get a depressed kid out of a tree? You cut the rope.
I don’t see what the problem is.
The Supreme Court came up with a solution to the tampon shortage, yet all the liberals are pissed!
If you are homeless, get a home.
What does a kid do when he's bored and he's sitting? He puts wheels on the chair and makes it a wheelchair.
What can hold anything on the moon? A crater.
How do you stop a dog from humping your leg?
Pick him up and sick his dick.
How do you stop a baby from crawling? Nail its hand to the floor.
In honor of Diddy:
The ice cream machine at McDonald's now works!
How do you get gum out of your hair? Cancer.
I wanted to solve teen suicide, so I shot up a middle school.
All Mia needs to destroy the evil young girl in Resident Evil 7 Biohazard, was using a pedophile instead of serum.
An old woman goes to the doctor complaining of extremely smelly gas.
"I don't understand it, Doc," she said, "I have this terrible, terrible gas." "Thankfully," she added, "they are at least silent when I fart."
Doctor hands her a bottle of pills, tells her take them all and then come back to see him.
The old woman returned a short time later extremely mad. "I took those pills like you said and not only is my gas smelly, but now when I fart they are obnoxiously loud!", she yelled.
The doctor said, "well, now that we've solved your hearing problem, let's see what we can do about that gas".