Society jokes

Genders are like the Twin Towers because there used to be two, now it's just a sensitive subject.

I was at work and a few fat women came up to me and asked for some help.

Later that week, I ran into them on the dance floor. One of them asked me if I wanted to dance. I told her no. The other asked me if I knew what was cracking. I calmly said, "The floor."

What's the difference between a Mexican and a Black person? One gets paid, the other got enslaved.

Kids make a lot of plans for people who can't drive anywhere.

You know you’re not liked when you get handed the camera every time they take a group photo.

What do you call a paralyzed kid with a gun?

Special Forces.

How do Taliban parents feed their babies?

"Here comes the plane... weeee, BOOM! 💥"

What did the orphan say to its parents?

"Hey, Mom and Dad—oh wait, you're not my parents. I don't have none. Will you adopt me, please?"

They people: "No."

What do emos and apples have in common? They both hang from trees.

There was a disabled kid at my door. He said, "I'm selling some cookies, want to buy one?" I said, "Well, if you stand up, sure."

Why are orphans so naughty at school? It's not like the teacher is gonna call their parents.

What do blind people and an orphan have in common? Both can't see their parents.

If you ever think no one cares about you,

kill someone, then the news will.

What’s the difference between a pickpocket and a peeping tom?

One snatches your watch. The other watches your snatch.

I like my wine like my women:

16 and in my basement.

So, I was walking around the outside of the building and I saw a kid and asked, "Where's your parents?" I love working at the orphanage.

Emos,

They're always a cut above the rest.

Voting is like doing a group project in school.

I did my part, but I’m worried the rest of you are going to fuck this up.

What’s one thing Obama proved during his presidency?

No matter how far a brotha gets in life, he’s still going to have the cops on his back.

Why do disabled people not like comedians?

Because they do stand up.