My ex misses me, good thing she'll never hit me.
Skill Jokes
Guess what, everybody? I'm dumb in math. I'm dumb and stupid at math.
There was once a dark room with a dark light and a terrible electrician.
Why don't you see elephants hiding in trees?
Bc they're good at it.
What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup?
Anyone can roast beef.
Time to play guitar!
*absolutely shreds*
Why can't you teach an orphan new tricks?
Because there is no one to teach them.
Aiden's the best, in any contest, and no matter what, he'll kick your butt!
Tushar’s Fortnite skills.
I'm really bad at giving directions, but don't take that the wrong way.
"Banjo players spend half their lives tuning... and the other half out of tune."
I'm a banjo picker, and I can confirm this is 99% true.
I'm great at multitasking. I can waste time, be unproductive, and procrastinate all at once.
What did Osama Bin Laden's kids not inherit after his death?
His hide-and-seek skills.
Your Mom's Favorite Book, Chapter 1: How To Cook.
I wanted to hire a butler for my new mansion in downtown LA. As he arrived, he introduced himself and I discovered it was Ghostionel Pessi.
I asked him why is he working as a butler? He told me that “a big game is coming up so he needs to refine his bottleling skills.” DAMN PESSI!
Why is being an electrician the easiest job in the world? It's literally light work.
You're the wrist-slitting simulator champion!
Why did the rapper go to school?
To master the art of RAP-LETICS!
Why don't rappers ever get LOST?
Because they always find their way with their GPS (Great Poetic Skills).
My Grandpa killed 30 Air Force pilots in WW2. He was a very bad mechanic.