Size

Size jokes

Santa

22 views ·

To start, I'm a big fella in size.

I saw a skinny guy act like Santa, so I went over to him. "You can't pull that off," I said. He said, "Then you try it." He gave me the Santa suit, and I dressed up. He walked by and saw me with 45 kids in line to sit on my lap and tell me what they wanted for Christmas.

Midget

98 views ·

I was walking by a prison when I saw a midget in an orange jumpsuit climbing down the fence. When he hit the ground and sneered at me, I said, “Well, that’s a little condescending.”

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  • Elephant

    6 views ·

    God: (creating elephants) Make it big.

    Angel: How big?

    God: As big as my d--

    Angel: Whoa!

    God: Fine, 10 feet tall.

    Angel: That's big bu--

    God: Put a long thing on its face.