Size jokes
Children are like pills.
The smaller they are, the easier they are to take.
What do you call a party with 100 midgets? A little get together.
Orphans get family-sized chips for free.
If someone calls you fat, just ignore them. You are bigger than that!
Your mama is so fat, the photo I took of her last Christmas is still printing.
When a midget smokes weed, does it get medium?
Huggy's so fat, Playtime Co. had to make him a monument of fatness.
Yo mama must be a giant, 'cause my Mini P.E.K.K.A. goes berserk on her!
Your forehead is so big, explorers mistakenly thought it was Mount Everest.
Your forehead is so big, they used it for the Berlin Wall and the USA border.
Your mama so fat, when she walked past the TV, you missed two episodes.
Why do American guns only have 30 rounds in the clip? Because that’s the average class size.
You can’t say “dwarf” anymore; you have to say “little people”.
You can’t say “fat”; you have to say “plus size”.
You can’t say “retard”; you have to say “democrat”.
Your mom's ass is so petite and big, I'd pound that till the Earth shakes.
Yo momma's so fat, her shirt size has more X's than Taylor Swift.
Tonight, I picked up an anorexic prostitute.
It was really easy because she was only about 90 pounds.
Yo mama is so fat, she falls off both sides of the bed.
What do you call a fat midget?
Jigglypuff.
If you give a dwarf 5-Hour Energy, will it become 10-hour Energy?
If you give a dwarf 5-Hour Energy, will it become 2.5-hour Energy?