Singing

Singing jokes

Mama

    • Yo mama so short, she wakes up every day in a brick house singing “Everything is Awesome”.

    Mama

    • Your mama so fat when she sits on the toilet it sings, "ABC, 123, get your fat ass off of me!"

    Singing memes

    Alphabet

    • The teacher asked a young boy in primary school, "Can you tell me the alphabet?"

    To which the boy replies, "No."

    The teacher then sets his homework to learn the alphabet.

    At home, the boy goes up to his mum, who is on the phone, and asks, "Can you tell me the alphabet?"

    "Shut up," she replied.

    The boy goes to his dad, who just won the footie match, and asks, "Can you teach me the alphabet?"

    But the dad is too busy celebrating and shouting, "Hell yeah! Hell yeah! Yeaaahh!"

    The boy goes to his big brother and asks him to teach him the alphabet.

    But his brother is singing, "I'm Michael Jackson, I'm Michael Jackson!"

    The boy goes to his sister and asks her for the alphabet.

    But his sister is singing, "In my big red car, in my big red car!"

    The next day the teacher asks him the alphabet.

    The boy replies, "Shut up."

    "Alright, I'm sending you to the principal's office right now."

    The boy replies, "Hell yeah! Hell yeah! Yeaaahh!"

    In the office, the principal says, "Who do you think you are?"

    The boy replies, "I'm Michael Jackson, I'm Michael Jackson!"

    The principal now says, "How do you think you'll get away with this?"

    The boy then replies, "In my big red car, in my big red car!"

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    • Lollipop

    • Are you a lollipop? Because I can suck on you all day.

    Are you an Oreo? Because I eat the cream first.

    Are you a microwave? Because I’m trying to keep you quiet at 3:00 am.

    Are you a sprinkler? Cause every time I see you I get wet.

    Are you makeup? Cause I’d spend hours doing you.

    Are you a guitar? Because I’d love to hear the noises you make when I play with you.

    Are you an elevator? Cause I wanna ride you up and down.

    Most restaurants are closed at night, but your legs aren’t.

    I’m not a cashier, but you got a couple of things I wanna check out.

    Are you Cinderella? Because I can see that dress coming off at midnight.

    Are you a calendar? Because I want to pin you against the wall.

    I don’t know what’s gotten into me lately, but I hope it’s you.

    Are you a doughnut? Cause I wanna fill you with cream.

    Are you a garden? Cause I want to plant some seeds inside of you.

    Do you sing in the shower? Because if so, I need a private ticket of your concert.

    Are your legs the twin towers? Because I’ll bomb what’s in between.

    Are you a blanket? Because you’re on top of me every night.

    Are you a phone? Cause I like to be on you 24/7.

    Are you a roller coaster? Because the faster you go, the louder I scream.

    I’m so jealous of your heart right now because it’s pounding inside of you and I’m not.

    Are you a popsicle? Cause all I want to do is lick you up and down.

    Are you a construction worker? Because you got me all bricked up.

    Are you a fireman? Because you came in hot and left me wet.

  • 4

    • Shirt

    • Bully: Oh, look at your shoes, look at your pants, look at your shirt, ay, ay, ay.

    Me: Ding, ding, sing, oh, did you hear that? It's the elevator 'cause you're not on my level.

    Bully: u_u ......

    Crowd: Ohhhhhhhhhhhhh

    Duck

    • How do you turn a duck into a soul singer?

    Put him in the microwave until his bill Withers.

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