Short jokes
"Time"? More like waiting.
You're so fat, when you jumped, the whole planet wiggled.
Maths...
....Addition, frustration, subtraction, aggression, depression.
Suicide
Why did the hobo cross the road?
To get the rotten donut on the other side.
Once you’ve seen a shopping center, you’ve seen a mall.
I'm a fast reader, I can go through 20 stories in a few seconds.
If laziness was an Olympic sport, I'd come in fourth so I wouldn't have to walk up to the podium.
Octopus.
Beethoven to Chris Doemges: "What instrument do you play outside in the Arctic at -12 degrees Celsius?"
Doemges: "Probably the shiver..."
I like George Floyd's new song. It is really breathtaking.
Why do lesbians have the highest rate of domestic violence?
Because women are emotional and full of drama.
What is a wasp called?
A wannabe.
Why is the sun lit?
Because it has much solar.
What's a foot fetishist's favorite food? Hot dogs.
What do lesbians love to use in art class?
Scissors.
I was sitting at a bench at the park and saw a lady. She asked which kid was mine, and I responded, "I haven't decided yet."
I tried to calculate 3/(my life), and I kept getting zero.
Like if you're voting Trump 2024! WOOOOO!
Did you know? The most Black Holes in the Universe are all found in Africa!