Short jokes
Your mum!
My name is Joe Biden, and I am running for US Senate.
How to protect your nuts from being hit: Just get hard.
Why did Billy kill himself with a TV remote?
He wasn't even REMOTELY close to being happy.
I made a website for orphans.
It's all about parents who want children near their location.
You lost 30 lbs when you joined Weight Watchers, and lost another 10 lbs when they shaved your back.
He had a song named after him: "They see me rolling."
Orphans' calendar consists of 362 days. Why?
Because they don't got homecoming, Father's Day, and Mother's Day.
What do astronauts eat off of? A satellite dish.
How are Eggs Benedict and a blow job alike?
You can't get either one at home.
Why do they call it America when literally nothing is free?
Person A: What do you call the dangly bit of an octopus?
Person B: Tentacles?
Person A: Ok *tickles person B ten times*
"Oh, waiter! Waiter!"
"Yes, sir?"
"Do you have frog's legs?"
"Why, yes."
"Good. Now hop along and get me a steak!"
Q: What do you call an angry monkey?
A: Furious George!
How much semen can a gay man hold? A buttload.
Bro, your hairline and an athletics track have one thing in common: they look like Humpty Dumpty.
What’s a rapper’s favorite type of fishing?
Catching BIG BASS.
Why did the snowman melt?? It had a melt down! 😭😭
What does a house wear?
A dress.
What is an orphan's favorite day?
Tomorrow: that is when the sun will come out.