Short jokes
Roses are red, your mother has said, "Come back again, and you'll be dead!"
Why can't an orphan hit a home run? Because they don't know where home is.
In honor of Diddy:
The ice cream machine at McDonald's now works!
Why was the baseball player stuck in the stadium?
'Cause he made his home run.
A lumberjack goes to a person's house.
Then he realized the tree was too big and was stumped and had to leaf.
Why were the Twin Towers sad?
They ordered Dominos and got Jets.
Pokemon: What do you call a killer that uses psycho powers?
Mr. Mime!
You're so goddamn stupid, you thought Dunkin' Donuts was a basketball team.
It's amazing how BLESSEDBRIAN manages to keep his head in the clouds while his FEET are FIRMLY PLANTED in mediocrity.
Why are there no Walmarts in Palestine?
There are Targets everywhere.
Why can't you say hi to a drug addict?
They'll say "yea."
Iran: We can beat the USA.
Japan: You do realize we beat him in Battleship, and he dropped the sun on us.
Iran: So?
Japan: Twice!
What did the orphan say to the crippled man?
I suffer from crippling depression.
When a homeless kid goes to school and the teacher says, "You have homework tonight," he said, "Sorry, Teach, I don't got a home."
It's often said that people peaked in high school.
I think Trump peaked in kindergarten.
Yo mama is soooooo fat that she was arrested for carrying 10 pounds of crack!
No, you!
Hey, wanna read here? Have a comet book.
Why are 9/11 victims the fastest readers?
They can go through 100 floors in 7 seconds.
What does Trump stand for?
Trump Runs Underneath My Penis.