Short jokes
How do you surprise a 50-year-old man? By putting a 12-inch dick through his ass.
He said, "Best surprise ever!"
Roses are blood red, violets are twilight-hued; your blood was delectable, and so was the rest of you.
What is the real reason why men jack off? They just enjoy killing kids.
I am gay, is that ok?
I be on top sucking dick all day. I make him bust every day.
What's the difference between Jane Doe and a field?
A field gets harvested in the fall, while Jane Doe gets plowed.
Why did the turkey cross the road?
It was the chicken's day off!
Your mini pecker is so small, the taxi driver said the ride was so short that he'd do it for free.
The ice cream man tried to murder me today.
Nutted in her braces, now my kids are behind bars.
Aside from being sexy, what do you do for a living?
Student: "May I use the restroom, professor?"
Professor: "Oui oui."
Student: "No, professor, doo doo!"
Why were there so many victims in the Grenfell flat fire disaster in London?
All the exit signs were in English.
Gun control...
What do you call a boy in your mom?
Your dad.
Guys, we should not make fun of 9/11. Like, that stuff is just plain out crazy. Like, you all should not let that fly.
What did the green grape say to the purple grape?
Sometimes I feel ugly, then remember I have a brother, then I feel better.
What did buttholes say after taking a dump?
Buttholes say what a good diarrhea dump.
How do you fuck a cow?
Find the nearest Karen.
Molly Burke and her mom were on a walk. Molly walked into a bar; her mom laughed and walked under it.