Short jokes

My dick was in the book of world records.

But then the librarian asked me to take it out.

I suffered The Great Depression.

All real chemists know that alcohol is always a solution.

I did this chemistry joke yesterday, but I didn't get a reaction.

What's the difference between a Doberman Pinscher and a Social Worker?

Eventually, you can get a baby back from a Doberman Pinscher.

Where did daddy cum in the bed?...

Everywhere!

"Abortion: Another word for dying at spawn."

I told my mom to get rope for a project, and when she got home, I got the good old coat hanger out and hung myself up.

Why did the cowboy put his bunk in the fireplace?

'Cause he wanted to sleep like a log!

Your mom should show you your real home. The trash!

If death was an option for a look, you could be the first.

Friend: If you don't like my bad jokes, I will tell some stand up comedy.

Me: But you are not standing:)

What's a suicidal person's favorite drink?

The depressay expressay.

Just kidding, bleach!

Yo mama is so black that she has her own solar system.

If the red house is on the left, and the blue house on the right, where is the white house?

In Washington D.C.

"Me fa so?"

Me: Tells a racist joke on the internet and no one bats an eye.

Also me: Tells the same joke at KFC and everybody loses their mind.

I told a kid in a wheelchair, "Use your nitro boosts!"

When you go to a baseball game and they say, "Heads up!" and you put your head up, and the ball hits you in the head.

Hey Danda, :^, Alex, Dangggg, Alya Kuhl, Jessica, Samantha, and Ariana!

What does Earl Bradley and an Xbox have in common?

They both get turned on by children.

Yo mama is so fat that she got on the scale, and it says, "Lose some pounds before you get on the scale, or it will break!"