Short jokes
A guy ate your hairline because it reminded him of a McDonald's fry!
God loved you so much that He gave you one face and started clearing off a place for another.
You know if you poo on the toilet at 11:59 PM...
Then at 12:01 AM, it's just the same shit, different day...
Why do poor people eat insects?
Because they're locust!
What do you call the American healthcare plan for poor people?
Death.
Bro, I'm so gay I can't even spell straight.
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What kind of udder likes McDonald's?
Udderly unhealthy.
Dentist: “This will hurt a little.”
Patient: “OK.”
Dentist: “I’m having an affair with your wife!”
Where in the nursery rhyme does it say Humpty Dumpty was an egg?
Imagine being expelled from school for bringing a weapon to school.
Did you eat Chef Boyardee's food?
No, why?
Boy are deez nuts so big.
Why is the Azovstal Steel Plant important to the Russian?
Because it stores Zelensky's balls of steel!
If I throw a paper airplane at two twins, did I cause 9/11?
Wanna hear a joke...
I don't know, I'm too high.
What did the pickle say to his friend Rick?
"We are Pickle Ricks!"
Yo mamma so fat, scientists say she's the closest planet to Earth!
Quiet kid reaches down and class starts running.
Quiet kid: What's wrong? Pulling out my...
Hey guys,
I'm starting to think they don't have any candy in this van...
Why’s BBC called BBC?
The dude’s shlong gets bigger every time he says n-