Short jokes
Why do orphans hate mitosis cells?
They have parents.
What mountain cries the most?
A mountain under water.
Jimmy Savile should have presented Pop off the Tops instead of Top of the Pops.
What did the bones on the moon tell the astronaut?
The cow never made it.
What's the easiest way to get straight A's? Use a ruler.
Why can't orphans play video games?
Because they don't have their parent's email.
Why did the orphan fail all his classes?
He couldn’t do his homework.
Every kid in a classroom is relevant, because if one of them gets shot, they will all be featured on the news.
Let's have toast in the bath.
Why don't orphans go to Family Dollar? They don't have a family to go with 'em.
Your mama's so fat that when she went to space, there was no space left.
You're so full of shit that the toilet's jealous.
What did the mom say when her child came out?
"The head was so big!"
What’s the difference between a fruit and an orphan? One gets chosen :)
What do you get when you goblin with a shark?
Who remembers when Gwen was the only thing people talked about on this website?
Your forehead so big you got to take Tylenol pills, big like chocolate chip cookies.
Where do mermaids get a job?
At the kelp wanted station.
Me: Dad, my phone is broken.
Dad: How?
Me: I clicked the home button, but I'm still at school.
Dad: Stupid.
What do you call a woman in a fighter jet to the right of the president?
An escort.