Short jokes
One day a cow ate a fish.
What came out the other side?
A dead fish.
"Little John, she is fat." How? He said, "Like a pig."
Don't hate life, love it because when you want to live and try again in life, it's already too late. :(
"What do you call a fish wearing a bowtie?"
"Sofishticated."
What do you call Miles Morales Spider-Man from Europe?
Kilometers Morales.
What did Schrödinger say to Shakespeare?
"To be and not to be."
Remember what one of my gay friends told me: it's only cannibalism if you swallow.
Cyber bully: Your mom giey.
Me: nO U
Why can't an orphan sign up for adoption websites?
Parental Login: __________
what's flat and great for cutting? me.
Stop copying each other, fucking losers!
What's the first thing you say in anal sex..... "Holy shit!"
What is orange and will soon be wearing prison orange? Trump.
what song did people in Hiroshima listen to?
"Here Comes the Sun."
Whenever your ex says, "You'll never find someone like me," the answer to that is, "That's the point."
I wear a nose on my forehead.
Sister, you're ugly.
Other sister: I'm not your reflection.
PS. Sorry if it is not funny.
You're so ugly your mom and dad abandoned you, and you went to the adoption center, and not even the adoption center would take you or let you in.
Gun control...
What is another name for 9/11?
A forbidden game of Jenga.