Short jokes
What does a French guy say when he falls off?
Oh no, Eiffel!
I thought I saw a cool sticker on my office window, then I realized it was getting bigger and bigger.
What do you get when you die in Undertale and go to Temmie Village?
DeterMIENATION
Wanted to go to the zoo, it was too packed, so I went to KFC instead. Their monkey enclosure is better anyway.
Anyone want to eat me up? I'm in that kind of mood right now.
My friend says, "You should try Oreos with water."
Me: No, because my dad actually came back with the milf.
I was trying to make homemade baby powder until I realized it isn't made from babies, oops wrong ingredient... smh
Why can't gays drive faster than 68 mph?
Because at 69 they blow a rod.
Alcoholics don't run in my family, they drive.
What does a hooker and butter have in common?
They both spread for bread.
I saw two blind men fighting at the mall. I yelled, "He has a gun!" They both ran.
Why did Paul Walker regret turning in his test?
Because his grade went from 99 to 0 in less than a second.
Roses are red, Violets are blue, Hitler blew an 11 country lead, During World War 2.
If James Bond is the most famous spy, wouldn't that also make him the worst spy?
Riddle me this, Batman, what's long, round, and has cum in the middle?
Batman: A dick.
Riddler: NO NO NOOO! It's a cucumber!
What is the best thing about being back?
Free bullets.
I am your leader.
How do you ground a person in a wheelchair?
Take off the wheels!
I could never fall out of a boat because I've already fallen for you.
To stop my password from getting hacked, I changed it to something difficult to crack: "StrongBrazilianNut111".