Short jokes
What do you call a wheelchair user in a fire?
Hot Wheels.
Anybody know a girl named Candice? She just added me on snap.
What do emo kids like to do in their spare time?
Hanging out.
I gave my blind friend a piece of sandpaper. He said it was the most gruesome book ever.
"Whole November month, sniper lessons available in Dallas U.S.?"
I love gay people. UwU
How do you blindfold an Asian?
You use dental floss.
Your hairline is so far back, even the slaves can't plant that shit back.
Guy: Michael Jackson wasn’t in ancient times!
Me: hee hee egypt.
What’s the difference between a bank vault and you aunt's anus?
The owner of bank vaults don’t force you to penetrate it.
Helicopter, helicopter, Kobe Bryant in my chopper, Sitting next to burning daughter, Lots of smoke and little laughter.
What milk do orphan babies drink?
Not their mom's, though.
Someone went up to an orphan and asked him why he was talking to the air. He said he was talking to his mom.
Why are lesbians so bad at math? They can't multiply.
Pickup line for gay people:
Roses are red, Antarctica is in the south, Get on your knees, And open your mouth.
What’s positive in Africa?
HIV/AIDS.
I kinda feel sorry for Hitler.
Looking back at some old photos of him, his friends always left him hanging when he went for a high-five.
What's better: nailing Jesus or getting nailed?
Depends on who's sucking.
One time in my dream, I had a dream that all people in wheelchairs could walk. It was awesome; I could walk!
Papyrus: Well come to the underground.
Sans: How was your falls?
Papyrus: G-g-good luck eve-ever ge-getting o-out.
Sans: Give me your balls!