Short jokes
Me after I watch a brother and sister do it: "Me, sister, let's do it";-;
When my bro says "YOUR MOM" when I'm talking when I'm at school, and my friend says "YOUR MOM," me punches him;-;
My mom gives me your stuff because you have bad grades.
Me: How about my 5 little brothers? I have A's; he has F's.
She lets him play anyway and I don't.
When I see the little brother in a video get everything, I try it and get grounded ;-;
My crush rejected me 2 years ago, and I still have never moved on. I'll be over her when a train is over me.
You learn from mistakes!
That's why you're an only child!
"A N N O Y I N G - D O G - R O B - Y O U R - S A F E."
How do you know if an Asian is a failure?
Figure it out, because they'll all tell you their parents said they were a failure from birth.
What do you call field day in Africa?
The Hunger Games.
Why does an orphan go to a sewer?
So it can wash up.
How did people bully Helen Keller? They said, "Wow, that was the coolest thing ever! You really should have seen it!"
Your mama's so fat that she can’t even talk, even if Kevin says, "Oh my gosh!" 'cause she has a big ass mouth.
Your mummy is so tall, she uses the Eiffel Tower as a dildo.
Why can orphans travel around so much?
A. They never get homesick.
What do u call an Asian that was born at the wrong time?
Wrong тайминг.
Queen Elizabeth came back before your dad did.
Q: What do you get when you cross Raggedy Ann with the Pillsbury Dough Boy?
A: A red-headed bitch with a yeast infection.
I asked my kid to give me a hand. That motherfucker cried while charging his mechanical arm.
Why was the orphan stupid?
Because his parents couldn't guide him.
Why do mountains never rest?
Because it’s ever-est.