Short jokes
Why did Sally fall off the swing?
Because she had no arms.
Knock, knock.
Not Sally.
What kind of bride does the pedo icon like? A "maik order" bride. Why? The male part.
If you think I would joke about Alzheimer's, forget it.
I diddled for a total of 67 times. I am the ultra Gooner. My cum is everywhere. I am the goon master.
What do you call a black man in the army in camo? Incogneggo.
What do you call two Chinese lesbians?
Two can't chew.
What did the horse say after it tripped?
Help! I’ve fallen and I can’t giddyup!
Why isn't there a pregnant Barbie doll?
Ken came in another box.
What did Cinderella say to Prince Charming?
"Want to see if it fits?"
Haters are hating. I'm still alluring, but I couldn't give a fuck cus this site is dying and boring.
Why did the telemarketer cross the road?
I don't know.
I don't know either, but I hope there was a car coming.
Calling you an idiot would be an insult to stupid people. You're much worse than that.
My doctor asked my brother if anyone in the family suffers from mental illness.
He replied: "No, we all seem to rather enjoy it!"
Americans leave without saying goodbye, and Russians say goodbye without leaving.
For centuries the Catholic Church censored everything that wouldn‘t fit with their teachings. You know what I call that?
"Chancel culture!"
Why did the cellphone get glasses? Because it lost its contacts!
What do you call a German that can not see?
A Not-see.
Surveys show that 80% of women who wear yoga pants never do yoga.
And 100% of men don’t care.
Michael Jackson was the King of Pop until he got burned by Pepsi. Now, Pepsi is the hero, and now, we know the rest of the story.
What is Michael Jackson's favorite movie?
The Boy in the Plastic Bubble? Why? The boy who was in the bubble.