Short jokes

Short jokes

Age

I guess age is just a number, but in your boyfriend's case, a personal preference.

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  • Failure

    When you think you can’t fail anymore if you’re dead, then you fail at suiciding.

    Vampire

    I killed 5 zombies and stabbed a vampire with a steak, and then I started to wonder why they were carrying bags of candy.

    Ejaculation

    I looked up how fast cum shoots and it said 28 mph. That means that ejaculation is illegal in school zones!

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  • Cock

    Hey girl, are you a farmer? Because you sure know how to raise a cock.

    Leaf

    How did the retard get hurt raking the leaves?

    Fell out of the tree.

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  • Orphanage

    Cemeteries should be built next to orphanages, so the orphans can see their parents.

    Michael Jackson

    Why did Michael Jackson rush over to K-Mart one morning?

    Because he heard little boys' pants were half off!

    Leaf

    You are so skinny that the only difference between you and a leaf is color.

    News

    Good news, people! Michael Jackson is still alive. They found him hidden away in a goat pen with all the kids!

    Batman

    I was making fun of an orphan, then I realized he tracked me down. I made a bad decision. He was Batman!

    Pilot

    My uncle died in the 9/11 attacks. He was the best pilot I had ever met.

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  • Planet

    Bob: Hey bud, remember we're going to space!

    Carol: Really? I forgot to planet.

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  • Similarity

    A: What's the similarity between your girlfriend and the sun?

    B: They're both hot?

    A: They're both massive.