Short jokes
Morbid jokes are just like girlfriends. Not everyone gets it.
But why?
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
They can’t find home.
I don't like 9/11 jokes; they have a tendency to crash and burn.
A married woman asked her husband if he saw the future. The husband answered her, "I have no eye, dear."
An orphan comes up to me and says, "You're ugly." I said, "You remind me of Spider-Man: No Way Home."
A person asks a taxidermist what they do for a living. The taxidermist replies, "Oh, you know, stuff."
What did Thanos say when he snapped his finger? Another one bites the dust.
When Ariana Grande broke up with Pete, she said, "I have one less problem without you."
Why did the bird lay an egg on Stephen Hawkings?
Because he is Stephen HAWKings.
Q: Why did the ballerina get kicked off the squad?
She was standing way too close to the dancers.
I called my dog J. They said, "Joné."
What do my little brother and a vagina have in common?
They both ooze blood 🩸 when punched.
My name is Jeff.
Your mama's so fat, she needed NASA to make her ID card!
When a fat person steps on a scale, it says: “To be continued.”
A man walked into a bar...
Ouch!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Yo mama's so fat, when she goes camping, the bears hide their food.
I lost my luggage at an airport once. I sued the airline, but I lost the case...
One day, he started crying out of nowhere. Everyone started crying with him.
There was a crying pandemic going around.