Short jokes
What is hard to find but easy to make?
An orphan.
Blind people driving on the highway would be the world's biggest, and shortest game of bumper cars!
What was Kurt Cobain's biggest flaw?
He had a short temper and lost his head over everything.
Why do seagulls not fly over the bay?
Because if they did, they'd be bay gulls.
Sally fell off the swing.
Sally has no arms.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Not Sally.
What's the difference between a Catholic priest and the devil?
The devil always has horns... not just around children.
Know (DYM 24).
Why did the can crusher quit his job? Because it was soda pressing!
Your mom is so fat Santa Claus came down and said, "Ho ho holy shit!"
Q: What can turn a fruit into a vegetable?
A: AIDS.
For centuries the Catholic Church censored everything that wouldn‘t fit with their teachings. You know what I call that?
"Chancel culture!"
Me: Where's your mom?
Kid: [cries]
Me: [leaving from the adoption center]
Why does Joe Biden call women muffins?
'Cause muffins backwards is sniffum.
I got a call from NASA. They’ve reached your hairline.
Explain Bear, girl, you're tripping.
A man enters the bank and says, "Hi, I'm robbing you!" The man was arrested instantly.
How are you?
I'm glad we're all going virtual so I can cuss in front of my class and blame it on my stupid siblings.
What’s the difference between an alligator and a child?
You can’t abuse an alligator.
Did you hear about the needle and thread shop?
Never mind, it was needle-ess.