Short jokes
Homeless person says to a rich person, "I'm homeless."
Rich person: "Then buy a house!"
Me: Hey Joe, updog.
Joe: What?
Me: Updog.
Joe: What's updog?
*Facepalms*
Me: Lol in the corner.
What is Saturn's favorite day?
Saturday!
Someone said to me when it was winter it[’]s time for you to “chill out.” I was like 👁👄👁
Who do you call someone that steals his brother's girlfriend and [is] disowned by his whole family? Brandon.
Why do orphans have sex toys? Because the uncle isn't there.
What did the female dog say to the mirror?
Hi, bitch!
Josh Hemus - follow him on Instagram @joshhemus
What is white and fluffy? A peelo.
I always wear Puma, put my balls in your mouth.
I tried getting an abortion, but they said, "Sir, this is a pizzeria."
Q: Why did Sally get beat up?
A: She couldn’t fight back.
I got hit by a bus.
But the bus was my ex.
"My name is Osama, I lost my jobba, so I became a BOMBA 💣"
Easy! Peasy! Lemon Squeezy! 🍋😂
The Octopus joke! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.
I would tell a pussy joke, but you would never get it.
Once my girlfriend asked me to give her lipstick, and I accidentally gave her the glue stick.
She won't talk to me anymore.
People are making apocalypse jokes like there's no tomorrow.
Your mum... payed other people to take you!!!!