Short jokes
Why didn’t the train kill nine families of four?
Because he had no loco-MOTIVE. AHAHAH
Nutty.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
gamer
If McDonald's is fast food, then Dairy Queen is fast cream.
What did the emo guy say to the emo girl?
"Like ur cute g."
Should I kill the main character's best friends in my book? It's an autobiography.
Guy: Michael Jackson wasn’t in ancient times!
Me: hee hee egypt.
What do you call a dino stripper?
A dinohore.
Why can't you fool an aborted baby?
Because it wasn't born yesterday.
"I only eat food on the right of my plate."
"Are you good at eating?"
"I'm alright at eating."
Poop backwards is poop. 💩
What's a book never written? Beautiful sights by a mountain, by a rocky hill!
What kind of birds stick together?
Vel-crows.
"Guess what my wife left in the freezer?"
"Her miscarriage."
If I die, delete my search history.
Have you heard the joke about the sheep, drum, and snake?
"Baa" "dumm" "tsss"
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Jesus was a carpenter who got nailed to a piece of wood.
Your forehead is so big you can jump without getting hurt.