Short jokes
What is the worst part of milking a cow?
The smell of the dairy air.
"Hey, what's the Russian president's name?" "Putin?" "Yeah, Putin deez nuts in yo mouth!"
What does LGBTQ+ mean? Is it the premium version of GAY?
Why did the homeless man stop to help the kids cross the street?
To get them into his van.
Your forehead is so big you could roast meat on it.
5, 4, 3, 2, 1. A castle weighs a ton. 5, 4, 3, 2, 1. The Queen of England's won! I never thought she'd get it done, but her sister is a nun.
If the shoe fits perfectly, why did it fall off?
Why was the homeless lady only wearing one sock?
She started her period.
Orphan jokes are like families, not everyone gets 'em.
(Also, I banged ya mum ;))
How many dead kittens does it take to clog a pool filter? Seven when I tried!
Last time I got a piece of ass was when my finger went through the toilet paper.
What do you call a dog that can do magic?
A Labracadabrador.
The Harry Potter fanbase.
I see some objects over there... oh, never mind, that's a woman.
What's black and white and red all over?
A police brutality case.
I'm going to open a wellness center for ASD kids to be able to express themselves through music and painting. I will call it Artism!
How can all rape be prevented? Just teach your daughters to never say no to a man. There - fixed!
How do you turn a dishwasher into a snow plow?
Give her a shovel.
My mom got a clown for my birthday, but it ended up being my sister. 🤡
What kind of sex do priests love?.
Nun.