Short jokes
Teacher: What’s 2+2?
Jimmy: 2+2=feEesh
Teacher: Well, Jimmy I can see you're going places, not college, but places.
What do you call it when a gay guy farts?
An abortion.
"I hope my death would make more sense than my life."- Joker
Teacher: What does a chicken give you?
Student: An egg!
Teacher: What does a fat cow give you?
Student: Homework!
Which falls faster, a feather or an emo?
A feather, because the emos are always hanging in.
What do kids have in comments? They have parents, right?
If I had a face like yours, I’d sue my parents!
Breaking news (2020): Depressed pigeon misses shitting on people.
What's big and white and can't climb trees?
A fridge.
What’s the difference between milk and the air?
At least the air will always be there for me.
Your mama so fat, when she stepped on the scale, it said, "One at a time."
I asked the librarian if the library had any books on paranoia.
She whispered, "They're right behind you!"
He might have been a Fortnite player. Respect him.
You know you are from China when you use rice instead of glue.
I was going to walk to Verizon, but I decided to Sprint over to T-Mobile instead.
What do a circle and a sphere have in common?
They're round, and round is a shape.
What sound does a nut make when it sneezes? Cashew.
Why can’t orphans go on school field trips?
Parent Signature: _______
What's the only good part of your crush dying before you have the chance to bang her?
She can't say no!
The first rule of the Alzheimer’s club is…
Wait, where are we again?