Short jokes
Q: What do you get when you drop all your potato chips in your couch somewhere?
A: A couch potato. HaHaHa
When you're driving past a graveyard say: "Wow, people were just dying to get in there."
What falls and never gets hurt? Snow.
A policeman just knocked on my door and told me my dogs are chasing people on bikes. That’s ridiculous! My dogs don’t even own bikes!
The only difference between my grandma and the Twin Towers is that they collapsed faster than my grandma.
When is a rapist safe around children?
When his plans are oven ready.
Where do rape victims buy their clothes from?
The kids section.
Did you know that Americans fall out of both sides of the bed?
I moved so much stone today.
I feel like a guy from Palestine looking for his wife.
I found out how to gain millions of followers.
Run through Africa with a bottle of water.
What does a cop say when you shoot a ginger?
I guess orange is the new black.
The American Dream is real. It's just set and filmed in Toronto and not Texas.
Oompa Loompa Doobity doo, I got a glock and it’s pointing at you.
The mom: "Where did Timmy go after exploring that minefield across the road, honey?"
The dad: "Everywhere."
"Why did the band teacher get arrested?"
"For fingering a minor." Ahaha, so funny!
The couple next door made a porn film.
They don’t know it yet.
Do you know you’re supposed to wash your sex toys after you use them?
I guess that’s why Catholics invented baptism.
What do you call a black person with a pride flag? A Cosmic Brownie.
Roses are red. Violets are blue. You smell like shit. And you look like it too.
What's the number 1 cause of pedophilia?
Sexy kids.