Short jokes
I am Buzz Aldrin, the second man to walk on the moon.
Neil before me.
What part of "Another One Bites the Dust" do you sing to a disabled person to make fun of them? "I'm standing on my own two feet."
I watched a documentary called "Redline Carrera: Birth of the Memes." It all started with Paul Walker.
What do you call a depressed person's life?
At this point, nonexistent.
Do you mix concrete for a living? Because you’re making me hard.
Orphans are like vegans, no one ever remembers the nice ones.
How does a disabled man go to church? He can't, there's no ramp.
Why couldn't the pony sing a song?
He was a little horse.
I asked the orphan if he wanted to watch all the Tom Holland Spider-Man movies with me, and he started crying.
Why was 6 afraid of 7?
Because 7 broke into a daycare and ate 12 children before burning the building down.
What's a footlong and slippery?
A slipper.
I used to date a girl with a lazy eye. Turns out she was seeing someone else the whole time.
I can swallow two pieces of string and when they come out the other end, they'll be tied together. I shit you knot.
If you're American when you go in the bathroom and you're American when you come out, what are you in the bathroom?
European.
Why are cigarettes good for the environment?
They kill people.
My friend wants to do martial arts, but he's disabled, so I guess it’s partial arts.
What is money called on the moon?
Mooney.
Here comes the airplane.
9/11 happens the next day.
Why are orphans bad at basketball?
They haven't learned how to keep the ball with them.
What is a thing orphans have that we can never have?
Imaginary parents.