Short jokes
How many astronauts can you fit into a VW Bug? 11, 4 in the seats, seven in the ashtray.
The American Dream is real. It's just set and filmed in Toronto and not Texas.
What does a cop say when you shoot a ginger?
I guess orange is the new black.
I found out how to gain millions of followers.
Run through Africa with a bottle of water.
When you know that everyone thinks you're a hoe.
WHEN Y'ALL ARE MY HOES!
What looks like it has jaundice and is filled with stupidity?
A Mexican.
So I painted my laptop black, hoping it would run faster... Now it doesn't work.
Where do rape victims buy their clothes from?
The kids section.
What happens when a furry takes over Nazi Germany?
The Furred Reich.
"Why did the band teacher get arrested?"
"For fingering a minor." Ahaha, so funny!
The couple next door made a porn film.
They don’t know it yet.
I lost my dog. I probably shouldn't have named him "rape."
Do you know you’re supposed to wash your sex toys after you use them?
I guess that’s why Catholics invented baptism.
Roses are red. Violets are blue. You smell like shit. And you look like it too.
The mom: "Where did Timmy go after exploring that minefield across the road, honey?"
The dad: "Everywhere."
Jack and Jill went up the hill to have a thrill with pills. Jack came down, fuck a clown, and the cum made them frown.
Did you know that Americans fall out of both sides of the bed?
The only difference between my grandma and the Twin Towers is that they collapsed faster than my grandma.
When is a rapist safe around children?
When his plans are oven ready.
Are you George Floyd?
'Cause baby, you take my breath away... OOF!