Short jokes
Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance?
Because he was sans and too lazy to get his butt off the couch.
You're so bald, I rub your head to see into the future.
Russia: "Silence."
Ukraine: Help...
Michael Jackson's nose is so steep, it can be a ski ramp.
Who's Joe?
Joe Mama sucks my fat nuts, bitch!
Does anyone else here eat pretzels with Nutella? It tastes AMAZINGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG
Now you should let your imagination work... imagine naked Jesus with an erection... and nail holes in his hands...
Last night I had a dream about fishing poles, turns out it wasn't reel!
What’s the difference between bossatron5678 and a gay man?
One isn’t retarded, and one isn’t gay; the gay man is dead.
Roses are red, violets are purple, lay in my bed so I can suck your nurple.
What did the rapper say to the microphone?
"You better DROP THE BEAT, or I'll drop YOU!"
What do you call a crazy computer?
Wired.
Why did the Russian cross the road?
To get to the other side.
Crying babies are like parties. No matter how many times you try to end it, it keeps going.
I don't trust anything that bleeds for more than 5 days and is still alive.
What did the acorn say when it grew up?
Geometry.
(Geometry= "Gee, I'm a tree!")
Yulia
How do you win an argument against an emo kid?
Give him a gun, he'll just shoot himself.
What did the teacher say to the student?
Orange you glad to see me?
What do you say to a kid in a trash compactor?
You looking a little square.