Short jokes
A pun enters the room and kills ten people.
Pun in, ten dead.
I fear my last words will be "hold my beer and watch this."
How did the retard win the break dancing competition?
He saw flashing lights.
Q: How do you get the retard kid out of the tree?
A: Wave at him.
What does a priest and a clown have in common?
They both make children cry.
By the law, you are not allowed to have a sick bird. That's ill-eagle.
I got a phone call from a guy labeled "assassin" saying my life will end soon. I seriously doubt that he w- *gunshot*
What makes a depressed kid happy? ..... A bridge.
I was hunting at night for deer, and then I found one and shot it. I realized the deer I shot was actually my ex...
What does an orphan get for Christmas? Hypothermia.
I asked my friend if they will show me something retarded. He said, "Go look in a mirror." I said, "Thank you."
Roses are red, violets are blue, my heart is dead, I'm such a fool. -Juice Wrld
I got a roommate. He killed a butterfly, and I said no butter for a week. The next day, he killed a cockroach. Son of a bitch, nice try.
What did the Asian people name their retarded son?
Sum Ting Wong.
Where does the Batman go to pee?
The Batroom.
How do you put an end to MeToo? Just fill those combined showers with transgender women.
wo(man) fe(male) we(men)
dishwash(her)
Why did the tomato cross the road?
To ketchup with his friends on the other side.
What is a self-harm person's favorite game?
Fruit Ninja.
The worst thing about an owl is how they can maintain eye contact when you put them in a microwave.