Short jokes

Short jokes

Baby

What does a baby in a blender look like?

I don’t know, I close my eyes when I masturbate.

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  • Coffin

    What’s made of wood and is zig zag shaped?

    Stephen Hawking's coffin.

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  • Sex

    He: "Do you smoke after sex?"

    She: "I don't know. I've never looked."

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  • PC

    What's the difference between a PC and a 6 year old? I don't have to clean out my PC.

    Morgue

    "Where exactly are you taking me, doctor?"

    "To the morgue."

    "What? But I’m not dead yet!"

    "And we’re not there yet."

    Horse

    Your uncle Jack is stuck on a horse. Will you help Jack off a horse?

    Cannibal

    A cannibal went to the dietitian, and he got told to eat more vegetables, so he ate a disabled person.

    Abortion

    Why do more women than men oppose abortion? Because they prefer not to get raped.

    Game

    "I had raped the game young, you can call it statutory." - Kanye West in 2009 (Forever with Drake, Eminem, and Lil Wayne)