Short jokes
What did Gordon Ramsay say to Hitler?
“Oh my god, put them back in the damn ovens! They’re so under-cooked they’re writing fucking diaries!”
How can you tell Donald Trump is old and demented?
He can't distinguish between tanned people and cockroaches!
Why do so many people get charged with rape? Because they are too stupid to finish her off and bury the body.
A depressed man was caught on top of the Empire State Building with marijuana. Needless to say, he didn't want to come down.
Some guy farts and says, "That was some asshole behind me."
"Amen, "Amen," "Amen."
Hail Satan.
............
Oh, sorry. I forgot which religion I was pretending to respect.
What is the last thing that goes through a fly's head when it hits the windshield?
Its butt.
What do you call cows that have a sense of humor? -- Laughing stock.
There was a math teacher on a plane that crashed. What was the last thing that went through their head?
A pentagon!
(9/11 joke)
I once got raped. I was asking for it though.
What's the difference between you and an idiot? Not very much if you reword and post the same joke over and over.
Q: What's a German's favorite Undertale character?
A: Gaster.
What do you call a white man in court?
SUPERIOR!
How did Jesus like his chicken?
Crucifried.
The irony of metal jokes is pretty fun. But it leads to a lot of people stealing them.
What do you call an obese man with bipolar? Twins.
What do you call a short cow in tall grass? Udderly tickled :)
What do a bag of chips and a gun have in common?
When you pull either one out in class, everyone all of a sudden wants to be your friend...
Sex dolls are alive in the Toy Story universe.
When do you know you are getting a good deal on a boat? -- When there's a sail on it.