Short jokes
Why are orphans not boomerangs? Because they never come back.
POV there’s a school shooting.
American: First time, European?
European: Yeah, you American?
American: No, not my first time.
What is the difference between a baby and a canoe?
I would never put a canoe in my garage.
Your momma's so fat she started "Fat Lives Matter". Meetings are everyday:
11 o'clock McDonald's, 12 o'clock KFC, 1 o'clock Pizza Hut.
What's the difference between an ugly monster and you?
Nothing.
If a dog made a computer, it would have a mega bite.
What is big and bouncy and walks on stilts?
Why does an orphanage stay overnight at a school? Cause their parents won't pick them up.
Uh, six teachers are annoying. Thank God I am not getting picked on at school or on this website.
I’m like an escalator because I’m always letting people down.
Why do orphans hate school?
No field trips. Parent signature_____________.
What fell down the tree first, the emo or the apple?
Guess what? The apple, because the emo got left hanging.
Why do black men have nightmares?
Because the only one that had a dream got shot.
What do women and chess have in common? When you sacrifice the females and replace them, you are more likely to win.
What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Princess Diana?
Tiger Woods had a good driver.
Segma says, "32!"
Ligma Says, "And?"
Segma says, "Anding deez balls to your mouth."
Why do the twin towers and my mom have in common? They fell over.
When David lost his ID, I called him Dave. Where did Dave go during the bombing? Everywhere. Guess who came crawling back?
The average French car has 7 gears, 6 of which are in reverse mode just in case the Germans come back.
School was fun, but it was hard, almost like riding a bike that’s on fire and the grounds on fire and everything’s on fire because it’s hell.