What is easier to pick up the heavier it gets?
Women.
Short Jokes
Why can’t orphans be gay?
They have no one to call "daddy".
What talks high pitched and can't fly?
A gay man in Iran.
What's the best thing about fucking twenty-one year olds?
That there's twenty of them hoo hoo hee hooo harr haar dee harr harr
I used to be into necrophilia. Until that rotten cunt split on me...
I wanted to learn how to drive a stick shift, but I couldn't find a manual.
What's the most unrealistic part of Harry Potter?
A ginger with friends.
Hot women with big boobs work at Hooters, but where does a handicap woman work?
IHOP.
I woke up one night and it was really dark in my room. Then my TV started to float out the window. I said, "Drop it, nig-"
9 out of 10 doctors recommend for children to drink water instead of soda. That 1 doctor lives in Flint, Michigan.
My autistic son hates taking baths or showers.
I don’t blame him, I don’t like soggy vegetables either.
Why was the guitarist arrested?
He fingered a minor.
Want to hear a joke about milk? No, it's too cheesy.
What does DNA stand for?
National Dyslexic Association.
"Twins sitting in class."
Me: Casually throws a paper plane at them.
I tried to tell an orphan a knock-knock joke, but sadly, there was no door to knock on.
Why can't an orphan be a YouTuber? Because most of the videos are family-friendly.
Why does China have the biggest eyewear?
Because all their eyes are too small.
Flat Earther pickup line: "The Earth may be flat, but Uranus is round."
So you're in a hospital, you barely survive your suicide attempt. You see one of the scalpels, you finish the job.
