Short jokes
9 out of 10 doctors recommend for children to drink water instead of soda. That 1 doctor lives in Flint, Michigan.
Why did the cheetah get disqualified?
Because he was a cheetah, duh!
How do cows laugh?
Moo-haha.
What did the skeleton say while riding his Harley Davidson motorcycle?
I’m bone to be wild!
Your forehead's so big, it makes Kanye's ego small.
Not totally a joke but... What do all these rape joke naysayers have in common with rapists? They are also forcing themselves on others.
Imagine if on April first the government says, "Hahhaha, you all fell for it. Covid-19 is fake; we actually killed all those people, lol."
My girlfriend told me the dishwasher was leaking, so I brought home some tampons.
What do you call a retarded person and a stroke victim in the same bed?
Mashed potatoes.
If Al Gore started a math rock band, it should be called Algorhythm.
What is common in my AirPods and the Titanic?
They sync properly.
Nutted in my shoes, now my kids are taking a walk.
What is the difference between a whore and an onion?
You don't cry when you chop a whore.
What is big, annoying, and full of blubber?
90% of America's population.
What does Michael Jackson ask little boys before going to bed? Are you sleeping?
Hey, did you know that 9/11 won a Grammy?
Yes, best comedy award.
I can do a very good Michael Jackson impersonation. I just need a kid who can keep a secret.
I would roast you but you're already so hot.
Balls in your jaws.
Why are cows such great dancers?
They have all the best moooves!