Have you heard about the baby with cancer? It never gets old.
Short Jokes
What do you call a grown up with your sister? Your best friend.
I'm going to draw a picture. A picture with a twist. I'll draw it with a razor blade. I'll draw it on my wrist.
You know Bofa? Bofa deez nuts.
What's a kidnapper's favorite shoes?
White vans.
Teacher: "If you don't understand, ask your parents at home."
Orphan: "I don't have neither of those :c"
My girlfriend is like treasure to me.
You need a shovel to find her.
Next time I'm at a restaurant, and they ask what I want to drink, I'm going to say "bleach".
The world exploded, so now I need to visit Uranus.
What do you call a Russian man with three balls?
'Whodya nikabollokov'
The Arabian Sea is in which state?
Liquid.
Are you electricity? 'Cause I wanna get a bath with you ;)
What’s Mexico’s favorite sport?
Cross country.
moo.
Why are pirates called pirates? Because they arrrrrrrr!
Q: How do you make a 9/11 cocktail?
A: Light two Manhattans on fire and then knock them over.
A hot dog and a banana had a race. Who won?
The wiener.
Why did the sea cry?
Because it felt salty and blue.
Son: "Dad, are we pyromaniacs?"
Dad: "Yes, we arson."
I want to thank all the sidewalks out there for keeping me off the street.
