Short jokes
When your girlfriend has an abortion, it's kinda like dodging your own bullets.
The bushes outside got jealous after they saw your eyebrows.
Ok, there has to be SOMEONE on this website right now. Whoever that is, wanna chat? (I'm just bored)
My wife told me she'll slam my head on the keyboard if I don't get off the computer. I'm not too worried, I think she's joking.
I was about to say an African joke, but it was too dry.
What's the difference between necrophilia and a choking fetish? 15 seconds.
What type of camp does a kid with ADHD go to?
Concentration camp.
Yo mama so fat that she needs two watches for two different time zones.
I got introduced to a dwarf at a nudist colony the other day.
When we shook, the pleasure was all mine.
Why can't you kill a depressed person?
Because they are already dead inside.
Me: Your ugly...
Person: I'm not your mirror...
Me: I never told you to be my mirror :p
Name an ant which is very heavy?
Eleph-ant.
Once I saw Donald Trump and an orange and couldn’t tell the difference 😂
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Apaches.
Apaches who?
Apaches on your eye.
What does a house wear?
A dress.
What do you call a whore with a runny nose?
...Full!
What's your favorite color of the alphabet? True or false?
What is the difference between Bin Laden and Santa? One stops at the top of the skyscraper.
What do you call a cow that was hit by an anvil? A flat iron steak.
Q: What do you call a shed full of black fellas?
A: Retired Farming Machinery.